Open Letter to My Mom
Hey Kare!
Seven years ago last night I came to your house and sat with you. Then I laid with you. Then I kissed you goodnight, told you I love you. I left and went home.
Seven years ago this morning we were emailing back and forth. Seven years ago this morning we were also texting back and forth.
Seven years ago this morning would be the last texts and emails I ever got from you. Seven years ago last night would be the last time I ever saw you. Touched you. Kissed you. Said goodnight to you.
Seven years ago this afternoon, your husband, kids, and grandkids stood in a hospital room watching in shock and horror as you took your last breaths, assisted by a machine. We watched as you weren’t really alive but also hadn’t passed; we watched as you were unconscious but some part of you somehow knowingly waited for your sister to get to that hospital and into your room before you’d take your last breath. A part of you refused to leave without allowing her to say goodbye.
Seven years ago this afternoon you were gone from this place. You gained your wings seven years ago today.
Don’t worry mom, I’m okay (usually anyway). As I’m sure you saw, for the first few years since you left, I was a wreck in nearly every way. Oh who am I kidding, sometimes I still am! (“Lol!” as we would say!) And this day was torture on my heart. In fact, all of September I’d live in sheer dread of October 1 approaching, knowing I’d relive “that” day and those moments and memories all over again.
Not anymore! Today, more than I grieve for having lost you, I have chosen to celebrate Wing Day with you. You graduated from this Earth and moved on to a place and to things and Beings that I myself cannot wait to return to either!
Seven years ago today you saw the Light.
Seven years ago today you were welcomed Home.
Seven years ago today you were set free of any and all anguish, worries, pains, sadness.
Seven years ago today you gained those wings- oh I know you just love them!
Seven years ago today you reunited with your own mom, oh I can only imagine the smiles in both your hearts! I’m so glad you don’t have to miss her anymore!
I miss you daily. I’m sure you know that.
I decided today though, that even if I could, I wouldn’t wish you back here. How selfish that would be when I know what I know today.
I miss you. And.. Happy 7th Anniversary of your Wing Day!
I’ll see you when I graduate from Earth School, I LOVE YOU!
P.S. I have a surprise I’ve been working on for you- I hope you haven’t been peeking!
Listening to When I Get Where I’m Going by Brad Paisley
